What is a 'person'?
The individual being sees a body... with a name... and thoughts... and emotions... and memories... and we 'heap' all this together and assume it's a 'person'. It's an automatic assumption based on the evidence presented. A seemingly logical assumption... but an unquestioned automatic assumption. The exclusive obsession with the evidence of this person can be called.. a Narcissistic trance.
This assumption is an answer to a question we give to our selves... as in 'what am I?' We make the assumption automatically and it's never explained as otherwise. So the individual being that was asking is ignored... and the answer becomes dogma.
Self Inquiry is often expressed as the question 'Who am I?'... but it can also be expressed as an assertion - not a question... as in... 'I exist'.
Contemplating the fact that we exist can lead to the startling conclusion that we didn't actually 'know' we exist... we only believed we exist as a person. So when we contemplate that we exist it can suddenly and pleasantly surprise us that we actually do exist... and that this existence is a nameless, undefined existence... free from all definitions... and perfectly compatible with our humanity.
Spiritual traditions call this... being.
And once you know... without a doubt... that you exist... then you can say 'I Am'... without a doubt.
Knowing you exist is the open door to knowing... it's the unbroken silver chord to knowing because it's always available... as long as we exist. If you know you exist... you know. If you exist... you just know... all you have to do is seriously contemplate that you exist and sooner or later it will dawn on you.
The problem is we don't appreciate that we exist... because we assume we exist as a person... so then we are obsessed with the personal because it's all we're aware of. But when you really know that you exist you begin to appreciate existence simply for it's nature... until then there will be fear of non-existence which stems from only believing we exist. Belief and doubt go hand in hand... you can't have one without the other.
'I am' is just a declaration... that 'I exist'.
And once you know... without a doubt... that you exist... then you can say 'I Am'... without a doubt.
Knowing you exist is the open door to knowing... it's the unbroken silver chord to knowing because it's always available... as long as we exist. If you know you exist... you know. If you exist... you just know... all you have to do is seriously contemplate that you exist and sooner or later it will dawn on you.
The problem is we don't appreciate that we exist... because we assume we exist as a person... so then we are obsessed with the personal because it's all we're aware of. But when you really know that you exist you begin to appreciate existence simply for it's nature... until then there will be fear of non-existence which stems from only believing we exist. Belief and doubt go hand in hand... you can't have one without the other.
'I am' is just a declaration... that 'I exist'.
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Knowing we exist is Self Inquiry
Self Inquiry is often taught as holding on to the feeling of I am. But too often for the seeker it becomes a declaration that 'I am!' which is a form of 'holding on' to the idea of 'I am' which is a concept. So then inquiry becomes a distraction and as such it is incompatible with ordinary life as the same aspect of mind that's required to deal with the world is attempting to 'hold on' to something. So when it distracts from out ability to act we discard it at the first chance as dealing with ordinary life takes understandable precedence over any forced distraction.
But Self Inquiry can be compatible with ordinary life... and thus 'practical'.
First... when you know you exist this knowing does not interfere with the function of ordinary mind as it is not a thought... it's 'knowing'... which operates simultaneously with ordinary mind... just like being... because it's an aspect of being. So knowing 'I exist' is transparent to ordinary mind... and not a distraction.
Knowing 'I exist' is not a declaration in the mind but a simultaneous 'knowing'... which is perfectly compatible with ordinary life and thus, in this way, is 'practice-able'... so to speak.
Self Inquiry practiced in this manner is thus just 'knowing I exist'... as 'I go about my business'. And this knowing is perfectly compatible with ordinary life.
Knowing "I exist" is Self Inquiry. And when you know you exist you 'understand'.
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NOTE: If the 'person' doesn't exist then there have never been any 'persons'... ever.
In the end... it's an impersonal world... custom made for personal expressions and impersonal adventures... but being doesn't end because it's continuous.
NOTE: For a beautiful real time report of this 'impersonal existence' or Inquiry see the link below and pay particular attention to the paragraph below the section titled 'November 6, Varanasi Days' where he talks about how he "did alot of doing nothing today". This is truly 'seeing the world as it is'... http://www.heartspace.org/travel/varanasi2.html
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The Myth of ego death
The ego doesn't 'die'... not yet. It's only the attachment to the belief that we only exist as a separate 'person' that can 'die' in this lifetime. The only thing that can 'die' are false beliefs. That which exists... exists forever. But... as long as there is a shred of individuality there will be need for an ego. The greatest sage is still an individual but their awareness of being dwarfs their individuality... and their ego. But that tiny shred of individuality still needs an ego to communicate their message... otherwise they would be inert to us instead of sentient. Their impersonal egos serve the sage... not the other way around. People who report NDE's say their minds operate the same as before while having the experience... but they lose identification with the body which is a large part of identification as a separate person. But they still report as individuals even while their individuality is dwarfed by their experience. And they are happy to be 'dwarfed'... because their individuality is in its proper place.
The question is to what purpose is the ego used - is it a tool for communicating with other beings or mis-used for the purpose of distraction? When it's used as a tool... it's in its proper place and not a problem. When it's mis-used for distraction... then it promotes distraction. It's simple.
The ego only 'dies' when the individual is no more and we have a ways to go till that happens. Individuals exist in the afterlife. And on an individual basis what gets surrendered is the individual will... not the ego. Because in the end it's the individual will... separate from the One will that deteriorates into personal willfullness... and that is where the problem is. This is why it's essential to develop individual will... because we can't surrender what we don't have.
The ego only 'dies' when the individual is no more and we have a ways to go till that happens. Individuals exist in the afterlife. And on an individual basis what gets surrendered is the individual will... not the ego. Because in the end it's the individual will... separate from the One will that deteriorates into personal willfullness... and that is where the problem is. This is why it's essential to develop individual will... because we can't surrender what we don't have.
Back to the Main Page... Who Needs the Higgs (The Mandelbrot Mind) http://whoneedsthehiggs.blogspot.com/
Progressions on the Path: http://whoneedsthehiggs.blogspot.com/p/progression-on-path.html
The Seekers Dilemma: http://whoneedsthehiggs.blogspot.com/p/seekers-dilemmas.html
In and Out Mind: http://whoneedsthehiggs.blogspot.com/p/in-out-mind.html
Leading Indicators of Progress: http://whoneedsthehiggs.blogspot.com/p/leading-indicators-of-progress.html
